Cooking Pa Pa

Can't believe it....

My Dad never cook in his life. When I was little, he only cooked Instant Noodle.

This time when Dad came back, he had been preparing the dishes for Mom. I just couldn't believe it.

Cream of Corn with Tofu and chicken
Garlic Shrimp
Tomatoes Pork
Steamed fish
Veggie (Hin Choi) with Pei egg and salty egg
Beef with White radish
Soya Sause chicken
Salmon Sashimi
Korean Beef with 3 colour peppers

Dessert: Fu Jok Egg

That was a VERY LONG Cooking time as Dad is a newbie for cook and he had been learning from cook book. He could only do One thing at a time. from 3:00pm - 9:30pm.

I am very appreciated it. Actually, the food were not bad afterall. They were good.

Tonight.... I had Red Bean Dessert.... *sigh*....

Anyway.... ok lar... ok lar... it is very good... good...

Thank you, Daddy... You are the Cooking Pa pa...

Dear God, Help me...

Dear God,

I am so lost.
When he said, "I am scared, I don't know you anymore..."
That really hurts me. I don't know what I did wrong. that is the problem.
I am praying to you, bcoz I know you are the only one who can help me out. I am no where to go now.
I am looking at my breakfast, and didn't want to eat it, that is bad.
I am looking at my work and I started to work on it without thinking, that is bad.
I am looking at myself and I feel so disgusting, that is bad.

Please help me. Please help me to solve the issue between Kenneth and I. I have no clue why he thinks this way. Am I mentally ill? Am I nervous breaking down? Am I being a coward? Am I denying something that I supposed not to? There are so many questions in my head now....

Please forgive me if I did things wrong. I ran away from home bcoz I am so scared of my Mom. Mom's temper is scaring me and I don't know how to deal with it. The good way to make both cool down is ... that I stay away from the madness. Maybe I should go for a place no one knows. I don't know.

I am scared... when I heard what he said... First thing up to my mind was "Is he trying to break up with me?" this happened to me couple times... that sentense was the beginning of break up.

What should I do? What should I do? What should I do???

I am so lost... ... ... ... tears are coming down non-stop. Should I start taking the pills?

Hong Kong Trip 2009-2010

Mom, when will you understand?

This is not a very good start for a week.

Mom got mad at me without a good reason... just say that I am not very well behave??? What does she mean by NOT WELL????

I am telling her how I feel and how I think ... not even raise up my voice.... or with the RUDE TONE.....

For her, just different from her idea.... that is called "YELLING AT HER".... When did she start being so polite ??????

It hurts....

It really hurts...

It is so hurt to the family .... Hurt that how Mom treats us... Hurt that how Mom being so non-sense and never listen to others... Everytime... It is only MY problem, MY attitudes, MY issues..... She thinks she is always RIGHT!!!!!

Never wrong...

I really want to find Pastor Lau to help if she pushes me that far... I really want to but if I go to this step, that means... she will not stay here anymore... Then Dad will suffer in HK....

When will Mom realize this is not right? when will she understand that we are just telling her our opinions doesn't mean we are againsting her.

Humm.... it is not right... it is just not right....